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Thursday, June 24, 2010

Selfish & Lazy

Ask me to describe myself in two words & that is what I would tell you right now.  At least as far as weight loss is concerned.  Seriously, I need to kick my own butt ~ but I'm not sure I've quite figured out how to do that yet. 

I want babies.  I want babies SOON!  I want babies so bad it hurts more than anything to hear someone else is having a baby.  I have a friend that just found out they are having their third - exciting, right?  To most - yet I'm sitting here annoyed as heck because she's a year younger than I am and will have 3 babies before I have one!  UGH!  

YET, I know that if I lose weight my chances of having a successful pregnancy will increase A LOT!  Sooo ~ doesn't it seem that I should be working my butt off to lose that weight? Well, of course...but, am I?   NOPE!  I have become the MASTER of all excuses ~ granted, while most of them have validity to them, they are NOT the absolutes I am treating them as.  

So, here are MY excuses & my chance to play devil's advocate with myself.  I more need to put it in writing to try to really smack myself across the face with it.

My Excuse:
I have PCOS.  It does, after all, CAUSE weight gain.  In fact, I was thin & healthy before the PCOS.  

My Smack:
PCOS caused about 1/3 of the weight gain that has gotten you to this point.  The rest was you feeling sorry for yourself and eating WAY more than you should.

My Excuse:
I have fibromyalgia, and it makes it impossible for me to exercise because the pain is just TOO GREAT!  

My Smack:
Yes, it hurts...BUT it's proven that the more you exercise, the more the pain subsides and the better you feel... It requires sucking it up and dealing with the pain for a short time, but the long term is worth it AND, quite frankly, your case of fibromyalgia is a lot less severe than some people you have encountered recently.  

My Excuse:  (and really, the most pathetic of them all)
I don't have time to cook a healthy meal every night, and to pack lunch....and I can't order salads & stuff at restaurants because I'm allergic to the preservatives on the lettuce.

My Smack:
Really, do I even need to say anything but GET OVER IT?  

Bottom Line:
Yes, weight loss is going to be harder for me than a person without all of the extra medical conditions...BUT it  isn't IMPOSSIBLE and it is NECESSARY for my health, and for babies.  I OWE it to that sweet little spirit waiting to come to this earth.  I owe it to my dear husband who is wanting babies just as much as I do....and I owe it to my Father in Heaven who has given this body to me as a gift.  

3 comments:

Jodi & Chris Reeve

Melissa, I don't know how it is to have those health issues at all, so I don't have much to say about that, but I thought I could comment on the 3rd issue.

Could you take one evening a week or part of a weekend to prep meals for the week? I know it takes a lot of planning, but maybe it could help.

I love salads for lunch, but a lot of times I get home and am starving and don't want to go through the effort to chop and dice for 30 minutes, so I try to make a very large salad on one day that will last 3-4 days and just add the tomatoes in each day because they get gross. I don't know if that would work for you or not.

I typically try to make extra each night so Chris can take leftovers for lunch. It saves a lot of money and calories doing it at home.

Do you have a work out buddy or some system? I know it is painful, would swimming be okay for your pain? I don't know, just throwing it out there.

And I heard on Rachel Ray yesterday when I was watching on the machine at the gym that a viewer lost 70lb simply by not eating processed food and learning to cook real food, so that change in and of itself may help.

Good luck! I know you will find it within yourself so you can have that baby and I am sorry that the news of babies hurts you so much. Just remember all the blessings of our Father in Heaven will be given to us in His time, so don't lose the faith!

Jodi & Chris Reeve

sorry that comment was so long

Erica

Melissa, I am so sorry it hurts you so much to hear the news of new babies. I actually thought about that before I posted about it on my blog.

Although I could never understand how you feel, I can only imagine how hard it is. Nate's sister has gone through a situation similar to yours and it breaks my heart to know that people who do want children and would be such amazing parents have such a hard time! Like Jodi said, try to remember that Heavenly Fathers blessings will come in His time, and it will come, even if it takes time and is hard to understand why it isn't happening now.

I think this blog idea is great! I find myself having a hard time feeling motivated to eat healthy and exercise regularly too. I'm pretty good at making excuses, sometimes it comes down to just not feeling like it.

The times that I have had someone to run with or exercise with has been the best motivation for me. It's a lot more fun when you go with someone, and also if someone else was counting on me to be there I had a harder time making excuses not to go.

I know you have it in you to lose the weight. I think it is great that you recognize that you are making excuses (valid or not) and want to change it. It's that change that is going to help you get there!

I don't know enough about what you are going through to say much, but I want you to know that I'm rooting for you! I hope things get easier for you and that before long that sweet little spirit will be coming your way!

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